Baecation > Vacation
Listen, I am all for solo traveling. It’s great for soul searching and unplanned adventures since you’re bound by the limits of your own time. I have had some of my best moments on solo trips, but I have never had more fun traveling solo than I’ve had on a baecation.
What can I say; it’s a very important component of a healthy relationship in my humble opinion. My first real (read: post high-school) relationship set the tone for that. We had an unforgettable trip to Paris. That was my first baecation, and I’ve been about it ever since.
I don’t date women that don’t like to or aren’t interested in traveling. No exceptions to that rule, primarily because that makes a baecation difficult, if not impossible. One can only stay at local luxury hotel so many times before you become numb to the experience.
So, I saw a comment on @themelanintravelsclub IG page under a reposted baecation photo from @mimmacula (you can check out the photo here). That sent me down a weird nostalgic spiral and I thought about a few of the reasons I’ve always enjoyed a good baecation, and how eager I am to go on another one soon.
Detachment
The moment we clear security the world we are leaving behind ceases to matter, and will not matter until we exit that airport on our return.
There is something about being away from your friends; family and familiarity that makes you feel a certain pleasant sense of isolation. Isolation from work and day to day responsibilities, no one calling you to ask you to do this and do that; it really gives you time to focus on each other.
This is probably the most important moment of a baecation because without detaching fully from the hurricane of monotony that lingers over adult life sometimes you’ll remain distracted. Being able to pour yourselves into each other 100% is rarer in day to day life than we realize.
In one of my past relationships, my ex-girlfriend and I relished the ease of getting around The Bahamas. One of the joys of living in an archipelagic nation is that you can easily hop a flight to a neighboring island and get away from “the city”. We almost literally spent an entire summer bouncing around every other weekend to a different island. This helped a lot particularly in the beginning of our relationship because we were both constantly surrounded by people and couldn’t really “create” solitude. If we couldn’t travel, we’d have lost it.
Relationship Building
Her at 11:00am - “Baby, did you call the restaurant and make the reservations yesterday?”
Me knowing damn well I didn’t – “Yeah, 7 o clock right?”
*goes outside and calls restaurant*
Restaurant – “Sorry sir, we are fully booked for tonight”.
Me – “F*ck”
Listen, this woman was so mad at me it wasn’t even funny. Well, it wasn’t funny then but it is now. We had a little argument about this (even though clearly this was my fault) because I didn’t see what the big deal was and why it had to be that particular night. To the women that read this, before you get lost in saying “men are trash” or "yeah, that's how you men go", know that that is not the point of the story and also, it just slipped my mind. That's not my M.O.
When this particular s/o and I would fight, we knew things would get very heated – two earth signs, go figure – and so our protocol was “before you wild out, take a time out”.
On a baecation, sometimes you can’t take a real time out and you have to learn how to be mad at each other, and how to resolve it – peacefully. I mean, where you gonna go? Yeah you can sit in the hotel lobby, but you’ll just get more upset because you know damn well you don’t want to be sitting there. You could go for a walk but when you come back, it isn’t like you have a living room in which to ruminate. You have to figure your shit out with haste and precision because otherwise you might end up having to sleep in the tub.
On the flipside, you discover new ways to make someone you love happy. It’s incredible. When you are away from the normalcy of home and unabatedly embark on discovery and adventure you find out things you didn’t know you, or your partner liked. Sometimes this gives rise to new traditions within a relationship; Tuesday date nights with seafood and white wine, evenings spent replicating a favorite dish from a trip, the simple things.
Baecations help relationships build character.
The Sex Is Different
If you know, you know.
Maybe it’s because you’re breathing different air. Maybe it’s because you feel more free, and relaxed. I have no idea what it is, but sex on baecations is always top 2 and not 2. The “nasty baecation” is a whole vibe. It has to be somehow linked to the environment you’re in. It feels so new and unconquered, you almost want to try and f*ck everywhere, all the time. You know what I mean?
If you have never missed a tour, cancelled dinner, ducked out on your friends, made a lame excuse for not going to a party (#WeFellAsleep) or tried to go out but she looked too good and that booty smack while she is doing her make up in the mirror turned into “Alright Zaddy, you gonna get this work” then I don’t know what to tell you.
When she is standing in the doorway like this ------- >
Baecation means playtime. I don’t mind sharing some baecation experiences with you, and I to whatever degree you wish I am always keen to hear yours.
Alexa, play Pillowtalk x Zane.
It rains a lot in the Big Easy, especially during springtime. On this particular trip, we simply couldn’t go out because it was too wet outside. I don’t even remember if we ate, and I am not sure when it started but we got caught in ourselves for hours. Everywhere from the shower to the windowsill with the gray of the rain serving as the only kind of curtains, it was a sexy day. I really don’t think we made it out for food until that night.
Alexa, play Tell Me x Usher
London is a city I speak about often, and very highly of. It is also a city that I suppose is a common link between myself and a former s/o of mine. There is a hotel along The Thames called Sea Containers (which I would absolutely recommend for a couples stay). From our room there was a fantastic view of the London eye, and she had put some champagne on ice. The sunset must have ignited the fire and we both got lost in the sauce because I remember first being on the window ledge, and then we were both watching ourselves tussle in the sheets in the mirror adjacent to the bed.
I can’t wait to be able to go on another baecation. I have a few solo trips planned for the end of this year but ideally I’d like to flexing on a couples trip. I’m trying to sip champagne at a Chateau, eat the best food we can find, and have nasty sex on balconies with someone’s daughter. Just keeping it real.
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